WE DO NOT WALK ALONE!

"In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit."  Albert Schweitzer

There is an inexhaustible list of people who have inspired me to be what I am today!  I take credit for anything negative that I portray, but the positives largely come from others! 

Not the least of which is the Lord Jesus Christ, my wife Nancy,  my daughters Laura and Emily, my mom & dad, my sister Julie (and Ronnie), my brother Paul (and Judy),  my sister Susie, my coach/mentor/dietitian/friend Megan (and her fantastic staff!!),  Fred, Tim, Dr. Steve, Don and Amy, Jerry and Mary, Sue Jazzer, Daneel, Brian, John, and the list would go on for miles, and I already risk hurting someone's feelings I haven't included!

But you are included in my heart!

Thank you God for all the wonderful people in my life!

GAMING THE SCALE

I weigh in at the weight loss center every Monday evening.

It is always the best low eating day of the week for me.  I can be totally off my eating regimen throughout the week, but come Monday morning I get "weight loss religion".

Ridiculous, but true.  As if eating less on Monday alone will show positive results on the scale!

I clean and clip my nails, I shower at noon so that any 'heavy" grime may be removed and I shave extra close!

I wear lighter clothes, a thinner belt, remove all the money from my billfold...and anything else that I think might reflect a lower number on the scale.


Every monday night the announcer in my head speaks and says, "And now the condemned man steps onto the trapdoor, the noose is firmly around his neck."

Don't believe for one moment that the scale is ever your friend!  If it does show a lower number than before, it is only in an effort to sucker punch you next week with a higher one!

I'd like to pretend its the damn scale, but the real enemy looks back at me in the mirror. 

There is no gaming me.  

I have to live with the results of what I did or didn't do concerning weight loss management this week.

Living day by day and just eating right today without worrying about what I will or won't do tomorrow is best.

Today is all anyone has to handle.

Today, even though its a Monday, I will not game the scale, with God's help I will focus on healthy eating for a lifetime...one day at a time.

'THE GROOVE"

Self denial where food is concerned is not my forte.

Left to my own devices I would overeat on air if it were possible.

Part of the reason it is so hard for me to stay "in the groove" or mindset of eating less to lose weight is the fear of feeling hungry and never being satisfied.

Being satisfied with proper amounts of food is the "fat between my ears."

Food has always been more than simple nourishing enjoyment for me. It is totally wrapped up in emotions that I can scarcely identify.  It is extremely hard for me to stop eating and ask why I am eating. 

I really don't want to know why I am eating as that would force me to face potentially uncomfortable feelings...and...we can't have that!

Weight management is really as simple as controlling intake of calories and upping the output of exercise calories. This is what I call "the groove".

Simple.

Not easy!

Unless I'm in "the groove."

For me that entails a super-awareness of my entire force of will to accomplish weight loss.  A "hyper" motivation, a constant vigil of high mental, physical and emotional energy that gets focused like a laser beam in my consciousness to stay within the parameters of my eating/exercise program. 

Last year I was in that groove for about six months and lost 107 pounds! Yay!

Now almost a year later I am up about 16 pounds.

Frankly I have at least another 60+ pounds to lose, so this is the incorrect direction! DUH!

I am learning that being in the groove can mean something less than total consumption of every waking moment to guard my mouth from food.

It has to mean something more than that, as that "groove" is thouroghly mind-numbingly unsustainable for the rest of my life.

I have to be in weight management mode, not diet mode. It also helps while you are in weight management mode that you lose or at least maintain your weight. Ahem.

It is easy to be discouraged. I have been discouraged these last 16 pounds for sure! 

It is easy to have a pity party and pout.

It is easy to have almost any and every negative energy force you can imagine when you are gaining weight back. None of that helps, so I try not to waste too much time on that.

Key word: try.

It is NOT easy to write about it.  Hence very few entries these past few months.  

But I'm still here, I'm still learning, I still face the scale and allow myself to be held accountable at the weight loss center.

I guess I'm still willing to write about these experiences.

I really do not know it all. That is embarrasing and hurts my overgrown pride and ego. 

Oh well!

Tough tiddly-winks and all that.

I know what works for me, and as I fall, I intend to fall forward into the skills that I've been learning these past 17 months.

Who knows? I may even start losing weight again.

HOME OF THE FREE, LAND OF THE BRAVE!

So I've been on a break from this blog for two months...the bloom has been off the rose for a little while.  That's typical me...into something with all four feet and then cooling off.

Weight management, while never fun, has been less so these last four months.  I've managed to put some weight back on...about 16 pounds.

From a high of 379 to a low of 272 to a current weight of 288.


Learning to live "free" of overeating takes skill and determination and guts.  It's not for sissies.  It's hard as hell! 


Fighting a roller coaster of emotions and self-loathing and also not using food to buffer these feelings is a lifelong process...I will never "arrive".  I also do not have to give up...and while there have been days, I generally intend to learn the skills needed to prolong my life (and my quality of life) by continuing to manage my weight while trying not to beat myself up and/or quit because of consistent backsliding.


I just need to backslide in the other direction!

I have taken a little "rest" from writing the last couple of months as I haven't been as succesful in weight loss lately and I have been humbled some, I definitly do not have all the answers.  I was writing as if everyone was entitled to my opinion...which of course they are...but I got a little cocky.

It was a heck of a lot easier to write it when I was losing consistently and feeling so much better about myself.  That being said, most people who struggle with their weight have times of inconsistencies and weight gain, if not flat out failure. 

Writing from a position of weakness, could actually make it a better blog...I suspect many people will relate.  Finding that voice of hope and encouragement myself so I can write the way I wish to is the process I am currently going through.

I'm not sure how often I will have something to say, but as I do, it will show up here. In the meantime, if you are new to the blog, there is a wealth of information here already.

Living free from the tyranny of food, and being brave enough to write about it is now my goal.  Along with continued weight management  and ultimately weight loss!

God Bless the USA!

And thanks to my new friend Scott who nudged me back to this blog!

SQUARE MELON OR BLOCK~HEAD???

Square fruit stuns Japanese shoppers Japan has again shown off one of its greatest innovations - square watermelons. For years consumers struggled to fit the large round fruit in their refrigerators. The round watermelon is unlikely to go out of favour   And then there was the problem of trying to cut the fruit when it kept rolling around. But 20 years ago a forward-thinking farmer on Japan's south-western island of Shikoku solved the problem. The farmer, from Zentsuji in Kagawa prefecture, came up  with the idea of making a cube-shaped watermelon which could easily be packed and stored. Fashion food To make it happen, farmers grew the melons in glass boxes and the fruit then naturally assumed the same shape. Today the cuboid watermelons are hand-picked and shipped all over Japan. But the fruit, on sale in a selection of department stores and upmarket supermarkets, appeals mainly to the wealthy and fashion-conscious of Tokyo and Osaka, Japan's two major cities. Each melon sells for 10,000 yen, equivalent to about $83. It is almost double, or even triple, that of a normal watermelon. "I can't buy it, it is too expensive," said a woman browsing at a  department store in the southern city of Takamatsu."  SOURCE: BBC NEWS ~ http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/1390088.stm Round melons in square boxes?  Square pegs in round holes?  This is an amazing true story of man's creativeness and ingenuity!  I like things like this...they intrigue me. And this story made me think about how similar my own life is metaphorically to these melons. Only the story of my life to date would be how I "outgrew" (weight wise) the parameters of the box I was in. I ended up not becoming who I could be and became way more than I should be! My corrupt nature doesn't want to conform to any sort of restriction.  I was meant to be a "round melon" and becoming square was well...too confining. No one should be able to tell me what to do, not the least would be the dang scale!  What is the scale anyway?  Just a bunch of numbers that screamed back at me at how round and un-square and un-conformed I was.  Dang stoopid scale anyway!

BUCKED OFF THE HORSE!

Well................

 

This is part of life as a compulsive eater to one extent or another.

 

Preferably a lesser extent obviously!

 

This week, early on I was as good as I ever am and felt a sense of satisfaction (pride?) that I still was able to get back in the saddle and eat like I was really gonna manage my weight and actually lose some weight again!

 

I didn't even feel hungry for having drastically cut back on the volume of food I was eating.

 

Then came Thursday.

 

We went to Omaha on Friday and ate at one of Guy Fieri's Diners, Drive Inns and Dives for lunch..."Sammy Amato's Joint".

 

For supper we went to a steakhouse, had two appetizers along with our meal.

 

On Saturday we were at a bible study at the Black Bear Diner in Sioux City for lunch and the study.  They serve HUGE portions and I did everything but lick the plate!

 

Whatever weight management I managed in the first part of the week  has completely disappeared by now.

 

NOW WE HAVE A CHOICE:  Are we on a "diet" or are we weight managers?

 

Do we let the scale crush us or use it as a tool for feedback?

 

The "easy" way is to hit ourselves over the head, beat ourselves up and throw up our hands in despair.

 

It is extremely easy to get bucked off the horse...CLIMBING BACK IN THE SADDLE IS HARD!

 

What choices are there?

 

Give up and get buried in a piano case?

 

Well, as bad as I feel about not eating under control, the alternative of giving up isn't appealing either.

 

I have a tendency to blow my failures out of proportion...yet I NEED to use the upsetness of the failure to spur me forward...to "fail forward."

 

Yesterday is gone...today is all that matters now.

 

Weight managers have the same problem as Dracula's victims ~ It's the first bite you have to watch out for!

 

So I'm watching out for that first bite and will seek God's help not to eat it uncontrollably. 

Again.

Is it fun? No!

Am I better at using weight management skills than before?

Mostly.

Practicing weight management skills has to be part of your life...has to be.

Even if some days you completely walk away from healthy eating, even if it stretches into a week or a month...well that's where accountability comes in...it's the only way to counter not getting back in the saddle.

The week I stop weighing in, in front of my mentors who hold me accountable, is the day they start shopping for my piano case.

 

HIDING FROM ME

Has there ever been a time when thinking about eating, overeating, planning my next meal while eating, guilt from overeating and feeling crappy due to eating too much was not part of my life?

Yes, yes I think there was a time...it was in July. Yep July around the 7th. in hmmm... let's see...1967 I believe!

My first 50 years were all wrapped up in that life.

Thirteen months ago, God intervened and got me to a weight loss center.  It is a doctor monitored program and very healthy, which is to say that it is not "gimmicky". Gimmicks are only good for the people selling to you, they do not have your best interest in mind even if you know what they are doing and willingly go along with it.  We can really fool ourselves if we want to!

By August of 2010, I had lost just over 100 pounds and gotton down to my lowest weight in years. I weighed in at 272.  I felt great!  And still do!

BUT, (there's always one of those isn't there?)

THE STRAIGHT AND NARROW WAY

JESUS SAID: “You can enter God’s Kingdom only through the narrow gate. The highway to hell is broad, and its gate is wide for the many who choose that way. But the gateway to life is very narrow and the road is difficult, and only a few ever find it." MATTHEW 7:13-14

Jesus was speaking of your spiritual journey. My spiritual journey...really, anyone who seeks after God and His ways.

Which is not to say that God is hard to find...He isn't.  He was there all the time waiting patiently in line for me to figure that out.  As the saying goes, "If you find yourself farther away from God than before, guess who moved?"

Jesus CLEARLY stated that He was THE Way, Truth and the Life. 

How we respond is up to us. 

How do you respond to pure love? 

Selfishly, I want a broad, well defined clearly marked road. No hills to climb AND I shouldn't even be able to stub my toe!

But it's in the special paths God chooses for us that we must seek. 

Jesus walked the way of suffering how does my pipsqueak whiny junk compare to that?

When I try to go my own way...well it's like one of your kids who is sure they know better than mom and dad...if they're smart (and how could they not be SMART? they ARE your kids!)~~~they'll come around to your way of thinking eventually...I hope. 


I'm still waiting on a couple things for my kids to come around to...

...and God waits for me as His child to decide to try it His way too!  

One of those broad paths to eating hell I have used all my life is CONSUMING food to attempt to fill up the hole in my soul that only God can fill.


For the purposes of our talk today I'd like to borrow from this line of thinking and see how it relates to the process I go through for weight management.

I would prefer that I was determined enough to just follow a clearly marked path to eating recovery.  One, two, three.

I find that I meander through some side trails that are less clearly marked, and are tougher going.  Some of these are my stubborness to not do what I know I'm supposed to do concerning what I put into my mouth.

Others, God beckons me to. If I would only listen! 

Some, He allows me to get off the completely correct path of weight management so that I can learn how to stay on the "right" path better next time.

When I reread that it sounds like a fancy way to make an excuse for blowing my eating plan.

Yet, if I'm willing, God can even use that if I let Him.

It's no surprise to God that I am less than perfect in my eating. 

Everything in my life is "less than perfect" and I sin alot.

{Much to my shame.}

 Life is a dress rehearsal for the big event called eternity.  I find my clothes get snagged on the bramble bushes I come in contact with on the uneven, less than straight path(s) I end up on.  

No surprise to God.

What is surprising is the way He can use our mistakes to teach us...if we listen.

Sometimes I think God wants me to just relax and enjoy the view from where I'm at.  If I constantly agitate about what I do, or where I'm at, I literally do not stop to smell the roses.

Never mind that the roses actually grew on this sidewinder path because there was lots of bear pooh for fertilizer!  Ahem. 

I may feel lost, dazed and confused.  But God knows where I'm at.

There are no shortcuts to where I need to go.

Thomas Edison said concerning the trial and error in finding a workable element for the lightbulb: "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."

Oh how I wish to cultivate that attitude. 

This or "that path is a dead end...let's try another route." 

 Funny how I find myself crawling down a dead end path I've explored before many times!

Obviously if you read me regularly, you've seen some of the thickets I've gotton into. 

My life is messy and a mess.  I'm far from perfect as you can plainly see. 

Read back over my early entries on this site, why I had this diet tiger by the tail!!

Ya.

I had to be there to get here. 

I need a closer walk with Jesus.  Renew my mind with God's thoughts.  Seek His will for my life. 

Jesus is my example. 

Jesus said, "I and my Father are one." They were so intimately acquainted with each other that they were in complete agreement.

Jesus, having taken on the form of a man, submitted His will to the Father.

If Jesus had to submit, how do I think I don't have to?

Now I'm older, maybe wiser, and thinner too...maybe... but I still suffer from waaaaay too much fat between my ears!

And I have the blisters on my feet to show the rough trails I've taken to avoid God's way. 

THE PIZZA WARS

Last Friday lunch was brought into work...a rare occasion.  Normally, I have my own "safe" food to eat, which was available, but this was pizza!

Like the Japanese sneak attack on Pearl Harbor, my ship was sunk!

I have had one sample bite of pizza at Sam's Club in the thirteen months I've been working to get my life back and my eating and weight under control.  That sample bite was about 6 weeks ago.

About 3 weeks ago I was sorely tempted to order a pizza for home delivery as no one else was going to be at home and they wouldn't see me over eat.  I called my dietician and asked her to hold me accountable so that I would not end up ordering it.  That worked.  I knew she would ask, and that kept me on the path.

I had forgotton (on purpose?) that pizza was being served last friday. My guard was down...I decided to eat one piece.

Then I had a second one.

After everyone else left the office I went to the refrigerator and took two more pieces.

And I ate them.

This pizza was from one of my least favorite pizza chains.  If I were ordering pizza, I would not choose them.

My favorite pizza comes from Jerry's Pizza: 276-2359.  That number had been memorized by me some 40 years ago.  (They are a second and third generation business in my home town.) 

If I was going to totally blow my weight management I would eat 4 or more of there slices!

So not only did I blow my routine, I did it with crappy pizza!

That's the way of someone who is a compulsive overeater.

I'm still an expert at overeating, and beating myself up for it.

I have confirmed that pizza is one of my red light, three alarm trigger foods to be avoided at all costs.

I knew that already.  I know it again now.

So life goes on.

I attended an Overeaters Anonymous meeting on saturday, and have been pretty much on track to weight management again.  

Not perfect...but progress.

I'm not proud of the weakness I displayed, and I'm not happy to write about it.

This is one of my "crosses" to bear.

It could be so much worse, so I try not to have a pity party.  This isn't cancer for heavens sake!!

I am a work in progress...and a real piece of work!

And onward we go!

THE VIEW FROM HERE

About a year ago, Feb. 16, 2010 I started attending a weight loss clinic in my town.  They offer the HMR diet plan. http://www.hmrprogram.com/  I lost just over 100 pounds in 188 days and I have kept that weight off for seven months now.

I lost the 100 pounds by eating only their food...that is considered "Phase 1" of their program.


In "Phase 2", real world food is gradually reintroduced along with weekly classes to help you transition back into the real eating world in a safe and sane manner in a concerted effort to be trained how to eat healthily and maintain your weight loss for the rest of your life.


In Phase 1, I had very few decisions about food to make. I simply ate their food...period. If I got hungry, I had another of their meals or shakes. Very simple, very easy a little boring but you cannot kick on the results!




Now after 7 months of eating more real world food and the accompanying decisions of "to eat or not to eat" gets me worn down.  It is hard for me to start and stop in moderation!! 

It gets old, and my attitude is less than "stellar" sometimes.

YOUR FACE LOOKS PUFFY ~ ARE YOU GAINING WEIGHT?

A friend asked me this week if I was gaining some of my weight back.  He said that my face looked "puffy".

He has genuine concern for my health and my weight loss status and I appreciate his concern.

It was hard to hear the question and I wanted to be indignant about his lack of perception and discretion, but in reality, I am really struggling.

The honeymoon phase of weight management is officially over.

If you've ever been on a diet or tried to lose weight there are definite stages that are common to most. 

The first stage is very hopeful and you feel good about a new fresh start.  You are happy that you are going to start taking better care of yourself and finally shed the extra pounds.  Chances are you have some plan.  It could be from a magazine article, or attending a weight loss center, it might be a  fitness group you join at your church or gym.  Typically I find that I work better in a group support setting.

SLOPPY COPIES

The subject was perfection and its elusiveness when it comes to proper eating last Monday at the weight loss center.

I remember many diets in the past where if I had a "bad" meal...well that was it for the day..."No more dieting today, I've already blown it so I'm gonna just keep on eating badly for the rest of this day and start again tomorrow."

That was the mindset...if I can't eat "perfectly" at all times I'll quit today and start tomorrow ~ or the day after that ~ or next Monday ~ or the first of the month ~ or after my birthday ~ or after my spouse's birthday ~ or after Mickey Mouse's new movie comes out. 

Looking back on it now, I realise I was just setting myself up to fail.  The last person that was truly perfect, now sits at the right hand of the Father.

MAD,SAD,GLAD OR SCARED

I am an emotional eater.

I seldom know what emotion I am "eating"...but I do.

And I have.

I used to say if it was a "good" day ~~"Let's order a pizza!" 

If it was a "bad" day ~~"Let's order a pizza and get EXTRA cheeze!"


That was pretty much my emotional range.  Though I didn't really recognise that about myself at the time.  Or only to the extent to joke about it, which is one of me "defense" mechanisms.

Who defends me from me???

"Ooooh...Mongo happy...oooohhh....eeeeatttt.
Ooooh...Mongo sad...oooohhh....eeeeatttt."


Yes, I realize it's more complex than that...but I was never concerned with what emotion was causing me to eat...they were mostly negative emotions I was trying to stuff away with food.


Food first, feel later. Hopefully later will be a long way off.

BURN THE SHIPS!

"When Spanish Conquistador Hernando Cortez landed in Mexico, one of his first orders to his men was to burn the ships. Cortez was committed to his mission and did not want to allow himself or his men the option of going back to Spain. By removing this option, Cortez and his men were forced to focus on how they could make the mission successful.

They had no ships to retreat to and only God to assist them."

I've been struggling lately in my overall commitment to healthy living.  I have not been exercising much at all, and eating "properly" gets real old at times.  I am very thankful that I have been able to maintain the weight loss I have, but wonder if I will really manage to lose further weight and keep it off for the future.

I have a lot of fears.  I don't like that I worry so much, but in a way, that is a positive thing.  Not the worry, but my recognising it for what it is. 

I have always "eaten my feelings."  Good and bad feelings.  It is easy to fall into that trap because it is such familiar territory.  In times past I have always preferred dealing with the devil I knew. 

The new "devil" might be worse!  Again fear!

What if I step off this program and start eating super compulsively again?

I WAS HONORED TO SPEAK TO A GROUP OF DOCTORS THE OTHER NIGHT

Synopsis: The weight loss center I attend held an informational meeting for local doctors and healthcare providers this week, and asked me and two other of their clients to speak about our experiences with their weight loss/management program.  

The weight loss center is striving for more doctor referrals for their patients with weight struggles. I had planned to share about my doctors role in my experience but did not know he would be there.  Along with the honor of being asked to speak, it was an extra blessing for me to be able to publicly thank him!  This is what I said with some slight editing...   



 ~ I’ve been asked to share a little bit of my story with you.

I have struggled with being overweight all my life.



In 1982 I went to Weight Watchers and lost 45 pounds and achieved goal weight of 195 pounds. In 1990 I lost 117 pounds at Weight Watchers and was below goal weight at 183 pounds.


Three years later I came under Dr. Steve Gordon’s care. I had gained back close to 70 pounds and weighed in around 250 pounds. At that time I had no need for a doctor other than for when I would get an infection and need antibiotics or such.


In the 18 years he’s been my doctor, he has treated me for Type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure, G.E.R.D, depression, sleep apnea ~ and ~ I ballooned up to 382 pounds. If you’ve been doing the math in your head, yes I doubled my weight in 20 years!

ONE BITE IS TOO MANY ~ 10,000 BITES ARE NOT ENOUGH!

I was shopping at a local grocery store this week and walked by their hot food area.  They serve Chinese, Mexican and Italian plus some regular meat and potato entrees.

A young lady was standing behind a cut up freshly baked pizza and was offering passers by a taste.  All this takes place just ahead of the fresh produce aisle which is where I was heading...honest!

I find myself making instant decisions about food quite often every day.  Most of the time the default decision is "NO!  I won't eat that food right now."

Sometimes it's: "NO!  I won't eat that food right now."

 I walked past hurriedly and focused on the bananas 50 feet down the aisle.  Nice yellow/green bananas.  Good bananas. Sweet tasting healthy bananas.  Bananas...rich in potassium!  Bananas...so good and so good for you!

Sigh.

A CREATURE OF HABIT

I admit it I am a creature of habit.

 I buy gas at the same filling station and bank at the same bank that my folks did. I grew up with Skippy peanut butter and see no reason to try any other brand. (Except PB2! Boy that's good!)


I like a certain brand of shirt, and any shirt I buy must have a pocket! MUST!

I prefer Hanes to Fruit of the Loom,  and I used to prefer Chrysler products but Chevrolet may be winning me over. 

Maybe.

BEARING POTENTIAL FOR THE NEW YEAR - LESSONS DERIVED FROM THE ROSE

"When we plant a rose seed in the earth, we notice that it is small, but we do not criticize it as "rootless and stemless." We treat it as a seed, giving it the water and nourishment required of a seed. When it first shoots up out of the earth, we don't condemn it as immature and underdeveloped; nor do we criticize the buds for not being open when they appear. We stand in wonder at the process taking place and give the plant the care it needs at each stage of its development. The rose is a rose from the time it is a seed to the time it dies. Within it, at all times, it contains its whole potential. It seems to be constantly in the process of change; yet at each state, at each moment, it is perfectly all right as it is."

— W. Timothy Gallwey (The Inner Game of Tennis)

It seems I find myself starting over...a lot!
 
The new year some how psychologically conditions us as a people to foment some sort of list of "resolutions." 
 
I have never met a resolution I couldn't break, usually within 72 hours.  This is because, for me anyway, I am motivated by what I should do, not what I really want to do.  

Well, I want to do it as long as it is easy and requires no sacrifice. 
 
Ain't it the truth!
 
I'm my own worse critic too.  I can be pretty harsh on myself.  I probably deserve some of it, however the guilt that is associated with failure usually is "solved" by eating...which solves nothing and only exacerbates the problem.
 
A truly vicious and insane cycle.
 
So if I were to resolve anything this year, it should be to love myself more, and not be so motivated by guilt and fear.
 
When I reread the above sentence it makes me want to shout: "Psychobabble!!"

DAY BY DAY BY GRACE

Day By Day By Grace
by Bob Hoekstra


"If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me...My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me." (Luke 9:23 and John 10:27)


As we have seen, following Jesus as a disciple is another way to relate rightly to the Lord in humility and faith. Discipleship begins with renouncing the self-life and confessing death for the self-life. "If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily." Initially and continually, these humble and trusting responses to Jesus deal with self, which is the basic obstruction to following Him.

 Ultimately, three simple words express the very heart of
discipleship: "and follow Me."


All of the Christian life can be summed up and fulfilled in this profound relationship--a humble, dependent walk with the Lord.

POWERLESS OVER FOOD

The Twelve Steps of Overeaters Anonymous

1. We admitted we were powerless over food — that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to compulsive overeaters and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

Permission to use the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous for adaptation granted by AA World Services, Inc.

Oh I can kid myself alright.  

Me unable to control what and how much I eat??

"Give me a break, I can stop overeating anytime I want! "

"I just love food, that's all!"

"What's the harm in another (slice, cup, piece, portion, bag, box, fill in the blank) anyway?"

Reality check: Go step on the scale, big guy.

What is "pleasant" about being plump?

"Big boned" in reality is a myth, unless you're in the butcher shop.  And even then, has nothing to do with your weight.

"Fat people are usually jolly." If we are outwardly, it's only because we want to distract you from our rotundness, and make you like us in spite of our big bellies (that must be jelly, cause jam don't shake like that!)

Sigh.